


you know i'm a forgiver

by angelfeast (miscellanium)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Asexual Character, Consent Issues, Dreamwalking, Episode Tag, Hand Jobs, M/M, Religion Kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-28
Updated: 2013-01-28
Packaged: 2017-11-27 06:03:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/658742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miscellanium/pseuds/angelfeast
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Granted, a sex dream that involves, what, being blessed by an angel is pretty weird, but fuck it. He's had weirder.</p><p>[For Porn Battle XIV prompts <i>water, faith, soul</i>]</p>
            </blockquote>





	you know i'm a forgiver

**Author's Note:**

> **set after 6.19. warning: noncon soulfisting.**
> 
>  
> 
> if desired, this can be read as taking place in the same 'verse as [mission square](http://archiveofourown.org/works/296929). title from [personal jesus](http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/johnnycash/personaljesus.html).

Sam walks along the shore of Rogue River, his eyes closed against the white-water churn and spray, breathing deeply to get the taste of sulfur out of his mouth. When he stops moving, opens his eyes again, he's in a clearing where the river goes calm and spreads out. A few yards from shore, waist-deep and naked in the water, Castiel raises a hand and beckons to him.

This must be a dream, leftover stress from the day of the Jefferson Starships, whatever. Dean had said something, once, about how Castiel walked through his mind in the night, but Sam doubts the angel has a penchant for streaking. He hadn't had a sex dream in months, though, at least not one he could call his own, so what the hell, why not take what he was given.

This is what you've wanted for a long time, isn't it, Sam? Castiel's voice carries in the air, resonant and inhuman.

Granted, a sex dream that involves, what, being blessed by an angel is pretty weird, but fuck it. He's had weirder.

And Sam doesn't say yes, not in the way he would have four years ago, but Castiel's outstretched hands and steady gaze are a gesture of faith in their own way and he's never found it easy to say no. So he shrugs and takes off his clothes, the air warm and still on his bare skin, and walks into the water.

Castiel looks at him with quiet, visible amusement. You could have left your clothes on. This—My vessel asked to feel the water, ou adds after a beat, glancing down.

Self-conscious now, Sam moves more quickly, the cold of the river striking into his bones, until he's about a foot away from Castiel. Under the surface, through the reflection of the sun and the trees, he can see the angel's toes. Jimmy's toes, Jimmy's hairy legs, Jimmy's cock. The guy'd said yes to being taken again, he'd been there, watched it happen. Sam closes his eyes again, shoves away the memories, focuses instead on the looming chance to finally put an expression on that face he can be proud of.

I'm sorry this didn't happen sooner. Castiel's almost whispering, ou's voice low and sudden in his ear, and it takes all he's got not to jump. He's not leaning down, their heights not close, but an angel's got tricks, he supposes.

Castiel embraces him, the gesture hesitant, and rests ou's cheek against his chest. We heard your prayers for forgiveness, Sam. We always did. But— Even though Sam can't see ou's face he can feel the frown against his skin. I'm sorry.

Let's, let's not talk. Sam holds Castiel by the shoulders, slips his leg between the angel's thighs. He slides his hands down along the curve of Castiel's shoulderblades, following ou's spine to his ass, as he grinds their hips together. With the warm air above and the cool water flowing past his skin, it doesn't take long for him to get hard, slip-sliding against Castiel's soft cock—

He raises his head, shakes the hair out of his eyes. Is something wrong, Cas?

No. Castiel gives him a small, reassuring smile. Most angels are, to the best of your understanding, asexual. And my vessel does not find you attractive.

Sam lets go to rub his hands hard across his eyes. Fuck, he thinks, and says out loud, Remember what I said about talking?

Castiel looks at him with narrow eyes, lips parted, but then shakes ou's head and takes his hands in ou's.

Hold onto my shoulders.

As soon as Sam moves, Castiel drops a hand to Sam's cock, still hard and hot under the water. Ou's other hand goes to Sam's chest, fingers splayed and pressing in. Ou's mouth hovers along the line of his collarbone as ou speaks, each breath feeling like a blow.

_Exi ab eo, immunde spiritus, et da locum Spiritui Sancto Paraclito._

Castiel keeps murmuring in Latin but the words blur together for Sam as the angel's grip on his cock tightens, moving in time to the cadence of prayer. The water around them sloshes louder and louder as Sam finds it harder to choke down the moans, the gasps. Castiel's hand is cold, colder than the river, which makes him ever more aware of the fact that this is something supernatural, this is an angel jerking him off, and—that's it, he's coming, the gutpunch force of it enough to bend him in two if it weren't for Castiel still holding on to him.

Castiel lifts ou's hand up, dripping with water and semen both, and presses it to Sam's mouth. Sam lets ou in, tastes the salt of himself on the angel's fingers, and closes his eyes.

_Accipe sal sapientiæ: propitiatio sit tibi in vitam æternam._

Then: the hand on his chest seems to grow heavier, warmer, like Castiel's supporting ouself against him, and soon it hurts, burns—he jolts, tries to talk but Castiel's fingers hold down his tongue, tries to look for an answer in those blue eyes but there's nothing there he can understand—

—the angel's digging into him, into his soul—

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

-

Sam wakes with a start, drenched with sweat and alone. Dean's snoring in the next bed. He'd been dreaming, walking by the river, then—it's gone now. He touches his chest, feels his ribs twinge.

Castiel?

There's no answer.


End file.
